Blue Ivy League
February 16, 2012
Verbatim
More →Overheard at Ivy
RCA, to zees: I just ravage girls.
Overheard in Whitman D-hall
Very large football player: This is a good apple. I usually don’t like apples unless my mom cuts ‘em up for me.
Overheard at Ivy
Ivy senior: I need to be wearing $10,000 at all times.
Overheard on NJ Transit
Sophomore Pi Phi 1: Hey, [name redacted], are your extensions made of human hair?
Sophomore Pi Phi 2: Yeah, it comes from India. They think they’re donating to God but really they’re just donating to Princess [name redacted].
Overheard in Frist
Asian girl, to black girl: I think that’s the blackest thing anyone’s ever said to me.
Overheard in Frist
Girl, working on group project: You know what, this is the last day in my life I am ever going to interact with you, so let’s just get this over with so we can never see each other again.
Overheard in Spelman
Weight-conscious guy: [pointing at manboobs] Do you think that I could get tittyfucked?
Overheard at TI semiformal
Drunk water polo guy: I wanna suck on candy canes and do some fucking narcotics.
Overheard at Cannon
Offensive Lineman: I'm not drunk! I'm just loose like a spaghetti noodle, son!
Overheard in Wu
Bro: Wanna come to Zumba with me on Friday?
Overheard in Rocky
TI-bickering girl: I just keep smelling cat food, everywhere.
Overheard in Terrace
Callous Terrace senior: I'm more interested in New York than autism.
Overheard in Frist
Guy 1: Maybe I should die tomorrow.
Guy 2: Listen, we're still recovering from Whitney.
Overheard at Ivy
Bro, to guy creating playlist: Hey, could you play a little more Top 40?
Overheard on the Street
Upper East Sider, talking about his jeans:
I only own one pair of sevens.
Overheard in Mathey
Princeton Student:
Billy Joel tried to get into my yacht club, but he got turned down the first time.
Overheard in Cafe Viv
Freshman Girl:
I really don't like militant black people. Why can't all black people be like the girls we hang out with, and wear JCrew instead of Baby Phat?
Overheard on Facebook chat
Sleepless Ivy member:
i jerked off
and was watching wonder years
nothing worked
ativan is better
Overheard in Whitman
Freshman Theta, dressing for party: If I wear two different socks would that be nerdy?