What do you get when you take a group of gangly teenagers with teased-out hair and black eyeliner? Emo kids who let out their emotions through Good Charlotte? Well, yes – but that’s not all.

In our modern age, technology has made it so that the visually impaired are able to partake in many of the same activities as anyone else. Text-to-speech programs, which narrate a website, make it easy to browse the web. There are even screen-readers that can “intelligently” interpret structures and frames ...

Heya Hippos! It’s a brand new week, and that means a brand new opportunity to eat less than you did last week. How much did you eat last week, anyway? It’s okay, you can tell us. I bet it was more than enough.

Hey there, Students. Are you feeling a little, well, chubbly-wubbly? Are your ankles a bit cankly? Are your hips bulbous and obscene? Are your cheeks filled to bursting with pie? Here at the Nassau Weekly we feel comfortable enough to tell you that you are, in fact, a little bit ...

Oh Gross. We accidentally just looked at you and your fatness grossed us out. Big time. Well, because we here at the Nassau Weekly are bonded together by a spirit of philanthropy and kindness, we are going to give you what you so desperately need: A brand new diet.

“‘Ere we come, ‘ere we come, ‘ere we come to eat some snacks!” That’s the song you sing as you roll your way to the feeding tubes, you glutinous masses of orca-fat-fattened lard-balls! And what do you have to say for yourselves? Nothing, because your mouths are blocked up by the pendulous weight of your sagging cheeks and you have forgotten all words except “more” and “a little bit more” and “perhaps just another dollop.”

The fact that I even own more than one article of lamé from American Apparel is pathetic. Wearing them all in one outfit was basically just a masturbatory statement of my “hipness.”

AAS 315 / CHV 424 / MUS 343
“We are not the same I am a Martian”: Afro-futurism since 1950 from Sun Ra to Young Money

ARC 210
Unpacking Foreclosure

1. Graph humor

Cam Asutra & Sue Trakama
Cam Asutra knew from the moment he saw Sue Trakama walking down the aisle in December of 2009 that their marriage was going to end in divorce.

ARC 269 / EEB 269
Owl City: Could It Happen?

Courses you actually want to take.