Overheard in Forbes
Alumnus '07: Do you want to know why I deserve to fly business class?
Junior: Obviously.
Alum: First, Iʼm better. Second, I have enough American Express points to feed a small country.
Articles I Did Not Write This Week
Russell O'Rourke
"Nassty"
an article about something sexual
by russell
"Going to Nass on a Sunday Morning"
an article about church
by russell
"Take it Up the Nass"
an article about the history of sodomy
by russell
"The Nasstic Age"
an article about how my frist salad tastes like the plastic bowl it came in
by russell
"Looking into the Nasst"
a Nassau Weekly retrospective
by russell
"My Doctor Told Me I Have Irish Nassal Passages"
an article about nose jobs on campus
by russell
"NASSTADONS"
a study of archaeological finds in Princeton, New Jersey
by russell
"You Are Invited To the Nassquerade"
this Friday, 11 p.m., at the Forbes Blackbox!
an article by russell
"I Use Nassking Tape to Get the Cat Hairs Off of My Clothing"
wish I had a lint roller!
an article by russell
"Laddies and Nassies"
a survey of the next generation’s best and brightest!
a survey by russell
"Nasstafarian!"
my great spring break:
a week-in-review by russell
"Tonight I’m Getting NASSTERED"
The Nassau Weekly’s version of “The Street”
interviews: what people think they’ll do this thursday night, and our commentaries on their dumb hopes (getting nass)
a collective piece by staff writers, idea by russell, though
"Who Nassed the Gas?"
a haiku by colin pfeiffer, about smells around campus.
poem by Emily Dickinson by russell
"I’m Trapped in the Nasstle"
a tale of woe, imprisonment, kinky sex, and redemption, set in the 1490s
starring russell o’rourke and scarlett johansson
"The Mormon Tabernasscle"
have you ever seen an organ that LOOKS more like a penis?!?
insight by russell’s mom, actually
"Sweet Sweetback’s Baadnasssss Song"
a movie directed by Melvin Van Peebles, with artistic direction by Russell O’Rourke
"Good Nass and Good Night"
a collection of bedtime stories, illustrated in watercolor
by russell (please print this one in color)
"Nassty Girl"
an article about the rise and fall of Destiny’s Child
by russell
"Nasstrology"
R U a Pisces? Do I look like I give a shit?
online blog post, and attitude, by russell
"Nassturbating On a Friday Night"
an article about masturbating
by Conor Gannon