Four Shiny Haikus, like Four Shiny Small Roses

My friend got a job
Hey, it’s fine, I got head from
your sister

I deserve an A
But I won’t do you. You are
a Guest Lecturer

Listen, babe, I swear
She looked like you except for
The wandering eye

That herbal tooth paste
It’s too minty for my balls
No, really, stop it.